Hot! Axed Again

That sickening feeling in your stomach isn’t the realization you just drank out of your buddy’s beer can that he was using for an ashtray, it’s the knowledge that if the Blewers actually take a lead of less than three runs into the 8th and 9th inning of a baseball game, they are destined to ruin your evening if you’ve just spent the last three hours listening to it on the radio.

I was just going to make a few minor copy changes to yesterday’s “Wurst Loss Of The Season” post, since the difference betwwen the ending of game two and game three of the Battle Royale were negligible, however, due to the tantalizing opprtunity to pounce on yet more miscues by this wayward bunch called the Milwaukee Brewers, I’ll go with something fresh, if that’s even possible.

John Axford, he of the homeless person look, was at it again. The Axed Man is now 1-3 with a 5.55 ERA and two straight blown saves. Skipper Ron has indicated that he intends to trot him out there again tonight, that is, of course, if Yovani Gone-Yard-o manages to keep the Twinkies from making the ball park their very own Gopher Ball Target Field.

But hey, let’s just not lay the blame on Homeless John, there is plenty to go around. For starters, how about the whole punchless offense? Solo home runs might look good to those who upload daily, but they do nothing for the win column when all you can successfully do on a regular basis is strand runners in scoring position.

THen there’s one Rickie Weaks, still dreaming of someday being able to hit the baseball again, now wailing away with a .164 average. It now appears Mr. Weak is going to take his
wandering mind onto the defensive side of things, as witnessed by the juggling act and errant throw that enabled the winning run to unbelievably cross the plate in last night’s
game ending Follies Brewgiere.

On and on it goes, to the players performing in poistions they have no experience at (Ransom
at first base), to now another impending knee injury to All-Amish Corey Hart.

To throw more salt in the already stale beer won’t make a bit of difference at this point,
one can only hope this weeknd series in the land of 10,000 lakes doesn’t turn into another
Nightmare At Target Field, featuring yet another terrorizing performance by the Ax-Wielding
Homeless John Axford.

Ax me know no further questions, I can only tell so many more lies about this club.

And For What

1 Comment

  1. I drank out of a beer can used as a chew spit cup…thanks Mike Harmeling.

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